Open Letter to John McCain and Jon Kyl

Bloggified by Jake on Monday, October 19, 2009

The disintegration of the Republican Party would be funny if it wasn't so damn sad and scary. The new GOP website, which is intended to attract more mainstream voters and convince the world that the right wing nutjobs aren't in charge has been up for about a week. The hottest topics today? "Suceeding" from the Union and kicking John McCain and Lindsay Graham out of the Republican Party.

What becomes quickly apparent is exactly what I pointed out was wrong with the party in my post about the Oakland Raiders. The extremists are chasing away all the reasonable, thinking, rational people. When someone says seceding from the Union is unconstitutional, he's called a liberal commie. Anyone who dares to point out that the Supreme Court is the highest authority on constitutionality in the nation is taken to task and told to go back to the Obama forums.

How much are the Republican extremists shifting the vision of the party? Who are the three most iconic Republicans in history? I'm going to go with Teddy Roosevelt, Ronald Reagan, and Abraham Lincoln.

On Roosevelt:
"[Teddy Roosevelt] did more to ruin American than anyone [else] in history."
(In this poster's defense, it's possible he doesn't know there were two Presidents Roosevelt and thinks Teddy is FDR.)

On Reagan:
"Well, was Reagan really a Republican? Depends on what terms we are using."

On Lincoln:
"Lincoln trashed the Constitution more than any other president in U.S. history."
"I don't recommend that you quote the tyrant Abe Lincoln to support your case."

So, if the New GOP is willing to throw those three under the bus, what hope does John McCain have? No wonder he--as you may have seen last week--was among 30 senators to vote in support of rape (or technically to oppose the punishment of rape) as it pertains to the free market and big business.

I am proud to see that Arizona is one of the few states where both senators were brave enough to stand up and support forcing sex on co-workers, putting us in elite company with such cultural beacons as South Carolina, Kansas, and Alabama.

For fuck's sake! Even Arkansas realized rape is bad! Are we really more culturally backwards than West Virginia?

Anyway, to thank my senators, I sent off this email:

I would like to thank you for having the courage to stand up and support proud rapists everywhere. The very notion that our government should not do business with a company just because there have been repeated and steady accusations of rape leveled against its employees is ridiculous. How would this country have ever been built if we held every slave master who ever raped one of his Negress slaves accountable for his actions?

Your willingness to stand firm with other true Republicans against the regulation of rape proves you truly understand what our founding fathers had in mind when writing the constitution. It is not and never should be the place for government to dictate an organization's morals through financial manipulation. Unless that organization is ACORN.

I only hope I can count on your further support of rape and rapists and will oppose any liberal attempts to tax rape, especially rape in the workplace. I pay enough taxes already!

Best wishes and happy raping!

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